Did You Have a Mentor, and Did It Help You?

26 Nov 2024 #career

That’s question I found on dev.to. Here’s my full answer:

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I’ve had mentors. But, not formally and without the label.

I can pinpoint two or three people in my career that were like “mentors.”

At a past job, I had the chance to work next to my team architects and learned a lot from them. From the value of reading other people’s code to rejecting requests politely. Here are some of those lessons, by the way.

And at another job, one day I decided to reach out to my boss’ boss with genuine questions, not related to the job. He was open and kind enough to answer them. He liked reading books too and we connected on that. From that point, we started to have 1-1s outside the usual meetings. He recommended a long list of books to me.

If you’re looking for a mentor, don’t ask anyone to “be your mentor.” That would imply commitment from one side. Most of the time, for free.

Instead of asking someone “to be your mentor”:

1. Approach him with genuine questions: Bring your own challenges and how you’re trying to face them. Ask what he would do if he were in your shoes.

2. Show interest in him: Ask your “not-mentor” about his career progression and choices. People like talking about themselves.

3. Help him somehow too: When I found books my not-mentor would like, I also brought them to our conversations.

4. Show you’re taking action on the advice or input you’re given: I followed up with my not-mentor, sharing lessons I learned from the books he recommended to me.

With those four steps, you will be in a mentorship—without even realizing it.

But, don’t worry if you don’t have a mentor or can’t find one.

Mentors are everywhere. The good thing is you don’t have to meet them. 200-500 books are a good mentor. I learned that from James Altucher, a mentor I haven’t met.